X Rated Wines. World Infamous. Occasionally Copied. Never Eclipsed Snark in a Bottle.
We publish our X ratings on our X Rated Updates & we highlight one bottle at a time on our social accounts. Get Whats-Better-Than FREE Updates HERE. Follow us on Insta or Twitter to get the GOAT reviews pushed to you as they happen, or check back here frequently
If we rate it, we recommend it. It’s just that simple.
2019 Terminim Cepages d’ Or Alder Springs Vineyard Mendocino. Super cool Rhône white that has all of the taste of a fall potpourri. Apricot, vanilla, a little anise, a smidge of citrus. This is the kind of bottle that makes me thankful for wine. Wine X Sez: XX1/2. #thanksgiving #winereview #happy #foodporn #rhone #xratedwines
2018 Jeff Rundquist 1448 (red table wine ), Sierra Foothiils. Can’t think of a better way to give COVID the middle finger than to grab a great daily drinker & start your weekend early. This petite blend (Verdot & Sirah) is highly infectious! Wine X sez: XX. #xratedwines #wine #tgif #weekendvibes #saturdaynight #winerating
2017 Zontes Footstep Blackberry Patch Cabernet & Fleurieu, Australia. Seriously, when was the last time that you tried to pour and you were shocked that the bottle was all gone ? Wine X Sez XXX. Really this is some bad ass juice my friends #wine #australianwine #mcclaren #foodporn #wine #xratedwines
Wifey Rose Sparking Wine. Veneto, Italy. Tart and fun. Tiny bubbles, but a big burst. No wifey jokes for me today, this one is a keeper. Wine X Sez: XX. #xratedwines #sparklingwine #italianfood #italian #wine
2017 Zontes Footsteps Baron Von Nemesis Shiraz Barossa good tunes and good juice tonight. This one is a burst of cherries and a touch of tobacco on the finish. Delightful wine to help slip into a weekend. Wine X sez: XX. #xratedwines #wine #shiraz #foodporn #music
The blizzard blues brought me to this bottle. Found a open Italian place near my hotel, and then found a liquor store next door. 2014 North by Northwest Red Blend Columbia Valley. Another example why I like Washington reds. My new Syrah-ish friend, I like you many X’s more than Southwest Airlines now. Wine X sez XX #xratedwines #foodporn #wine
Do you ever pop a bottle and wonder “where the F did I get this one? “ love to figure it out because this one is bad ass. Foundry Cab Oakville Six Acre Vineyard 2011. IM ON FIRE BABY. Wine X sez XXX. Sizzle. #xratedwines #winereviews #cabernetsauvignon #napavalley #oakville #wine #foodporn
2014 Talbots RFT Diamond T Estate Pinot Noir. Black cherries, cinnamon, and maybe a lil’ chalk. What time is it? It’s DRINKIN TIME. Wine X sez XXX all night long. #wine #winereview #xratedwines #pinot #foodporn
2018 Bernard Magrez Cotes Du Rhone Villages Plan De Dieu. Ever had a brain freeze drinking a slushy? I think I had one gulping this Rhone. Wine X Sez: XX #wine #xratedwine #foodporn #rhonewine #xratedwines
2011 Ernie Els Proprietors Red delightful barn find at the back of the cellar. Happy day, happy day! 9 year old cherry Kool-Aide. No juice pack required Wine X sez : XX1/2. I’d drink again #xratedwine #wine #foodporn #yummy #xratedwines
2017 Crossbarn Cabernet Sauvignon Napa One of Paul Hobbs’ family of wines. Imagine the perfect Manhattan topped with a perfect cherry, and begging for one more.... of both 🙂 that’s this glass. Wine X sez: XX. This is a really easy, comfortable cab. #xratedwines #foodporn #wine #napa
2017 Rabbit Ridge Allure de Robles Rhone Red Paso. Tasting a lot of G & S. Not much M, but that doesn’t mean it’s not Mmmmmmmmm. Mind blowing for a daily. Know what I mean? Wine X sez: XX and no shame, all smiles. #xratedwines #wine #foodporn #pasorobles #gsm
2019 The Vice Wines “The House”Pinot Noir Napa-Carneros. Strawberry and blackberry. Sinfully gulpable. Are some vices worth burning for? Nodding slow. Wine X sez: XX and testing excommunication! #xratedwines #foodporn #wine #pinotnoir
2017 Ridge Zinfandel Wild Cattle Creek Vineyards. You know how some zins are syrupy and port-like? That’s not this guy. He’s balanced and all finesse. Blue and red fruits plus some baking spice. This one’s bad ass. Wine X sez: XX1/2. And twice on Sundays. #wine #xratedwines #zin #zinfandel
2017 Artevino Estate Chardonnay Yorkville Highlands. Imagine foreplay on a newly Pledge-polished four poster bed. Lots of citrus, a little creamy, and a pouty face if you make me wait for more. Wine X Sez XX1/2 with a devious smile. #wine #chardonnay #xratedwines #foodie #foodporn
2018 Decoy Rose California. Just seeing if the rumors were true... paired with a lil roasted rosemary chikin’. Do I taste a lil Pinot from the waterfowl portfolio? Perhaps! This is Captain Marvel saving the world. Sexy & bad ass at the same time! XX! And an extra X on a hot summer day. cheers! #xratedwines #wine #rosé #foodporn
2017 Hahn Chardonnay Monterey County. I’m thinking Dr. Fauci in a SpongeBob toon. Tropical, bright, straight forward and believable. Wine X sez: X1/2 ..delicious & delightful #wine #chardonnay #monterey #foodie #foodstagram #xratedwines
2018 Folded Hills August White Wine Santa Ynez Valley. Easy peasy lemon squeezy. Just like Natalie Portman, this one is tart but really bright. Wine X sez: a crisp & clean XX #wine #santaynezvalley #foodporn #xratedwines
2019 Les Muraires Duce Vie Tentation Rose Cotes de Provence Dry for now, wet if you take a step to the edge. Perfect virgin sacrifice to the gods of summer pasta night. Wine X sez: X1/2 weeeeeeeee! #xratedwines #rose #roseallday #wine #foodporn
2018 Eden Rift Vineyards Chard. Valliant Vineyards Central Coast. Imagine sucking on a mouth full of Lemonheads listening to Jefferson Airplane. We gotz citrus, and we sure got acid. This bottle is Somebody To Love... Wine X sez: A trippy XX #xratedwines #wine #chardonnay #foodporn
2017 Jeff Runquist R Petite Sirah Salman Vineyards Clarksburg. Boysenberry, blackberry, a little mocha, a bit of white pepper. This one is nice. Just like the first written manuscript of Caligula .... deep & inky and hot. Wine X sez: XX1/2. Really loved. #xratedwines #wineporn #wine
2017 Kate Arnold Cabernet Washington. Trivia Day review: what’s velvety like a blindfold, leathery like a whip, and chocolate like the drizzle on...... yes it’s It’s Kate Arnold’s cab. Wine X says XX + smack that glass. #xratedwines #foodporn #wine #cabernetsauvignon
2019 Folded Hills Lilly Rose Rosé Santa Ynez Valley. The whole Victoria Secret model team sipping on strawberry lemonade. Mind blowing gulp. I’d lick if I could too. Wine X says.... XXX in my imagination and reality too #xratedwines #wine #foodie #foodporn #yum
2009 Stonehedge Cabernet Napa. Clove vanilla and berries. It’s like Christmas in a glass.. I’ve been a good boy this year Santa..... Wine X sez: X1/2 and maybe more if the holiday means I get a bj. #xratedwines #foodporn #wine #napa
2018 Crossbarn Chardonnay Sonoma Coast Am I levitating or did I fall in the pool? Who knows. But no mystery in the bottle... classic reference Sonoma Coast. Wine X says: XX and a skinnydip away from another X. #xratedwines #wine #foodporn #yum
2017 Jeff Runquist Petit Verdot. Damir Ranch, Stanislaw County CA. Big and Intesnse. Why be satisfied with “handful” when you can go all the way to “mouthful”!!! Wine X Says: XX. #xratedwines. #foodporn #wine #wineblogger🍷 #foodie
OMG. This Tahini label reads like a Wine X review! LOL #xratedwines #winex #wine #foodporn #foodie
2017 Maple Creek Estate Chardonnay. Medoncino. Trip to the Caribbean but leaving your lil’ blue pills at home. Tropical fruit and only a little wood. It’s really a nice chard. Wine x Sez: XX #xratedwines #wine #foodie #foodporn #mendocino
2018 Zontes Footsteps Shades of Gris (Pinot Gris) Adelaide Hills, Australia. Big melon and pear... which is too easy for a Wine X review. Think fresh bedsheets, lemon oil and a whip. A crisp pop and a zing. Wine X says: XX fo’ sure. #xratedwines #sexy #wine #foodporn #yum
2018 Clarice Wine Co. Pinot SLH. Chip and Joanna Gaines, you know…. but, a wine. Sneaky-sexy on their own, but nicely balancing each other out.
Wine X Says: XXX and not really caring who wears the pants. Or who doesn’t 🙂 #xratedwines #wine #foodporn #foodie #pinotnoir
2017 Mumbo Jumbo Pinot California. Appropriate that it’s branded like a kids game because its as tasty as grape Kool-Aid. A new wine drinkers dream. Wine X Sez: an easy X 1/2 and a sippy cup away from XX #wine #winelover #winetasting #yummy #foodie #foodporn #xratedwines
2017 Jeff Runquist Barbera Amador. Delicious berries and a lil’ butterscotch. Bunkering down and not coming out ‘till this bottle is done. Wine X Sez: XXX and wanting more. #wine #xratedwines #amadorcounty #food #yummy
2016 Russell Family Vineyards LPR Reserve. Paso. Imagine if The Rock played Austin Powers... Stong enough to take on anything, rich, and totally shag-able. Wine X says XXX & easily worth One Milllyawn Dollars #wine #yum #xratedwines #pasorobles #pasorobleswine #foodporn
2018 Treasure Hunter School Night Red, Red Table Wine, California - Dr Pimple Popper in a canoe with a bottomless goblet o’ raspberry Dippin’Dots. Lots of chill fruit flavors bustin’ out. Wine X sez: Coastin’ in at a satisfying X1/2, aye matey #xratedwines #wine #winedrunk #kitfox
2016 Russell Family Vineyards OVZ Paso. Imagine gettin a valentines gift of Laffy Taffy, salsa dancing lessons and a little blue pill. Its huuuggge... what else matters? Wine X sez: This is zinfully XXX #xratedwines #wine #zinfandel
2014 Loring Chard Rosella’s Vineyard SLH. Salma Hayek’s Oscars dress + a Harry & David delivery. White pear, and a lotta body....But ain’t no pear-body nosiree! WineX says XX1/2. Take a bite! #xratedwines #wine #chardonnay
2016 Rabbit Ridge Zin Paso Westside. Gettin’ in an a food fight with Leo DiCaprio at a Jamba Juice. A hot, sexy, vanilla & mixed berry pop in the mouth. I won’t even duck next time. Wine X sez XX all the way #xratedwines #wine #zin
2017 Hahn Cabernet Sauvignon California. Elvis not-so-incognito shopping in Sephora. Velvety and perfumey with flair. Wine X says X1/2 plus a hunk a hunk of mmmm. #wine #cabernetsauvignon #xratedwines
2017 Zontes Footsteps Hills Are Alive Shiraz Adelaide Hills: So berry spicy, so blue-tiful .... hey sexy, wanna come play my Strat? Wine X Says..XX + a power chord. #wine #shiraz #syrah #xratedwines
Peake Ranch Bellis Noir Sta Rita Hills 2017 - Think John Wayne in a pissed off mood. Ain’t no doubt this one is an ass kicker. An easy XXX with some serious admiration to boot @peakeranchwines #wine #xratedwines #syrah
Russell Family Vineyards Seventy 2017: Imagine Taylor Swift and Violet Beauregarde wrestling in blueberry jello. There’s a lot going on here and it’s alllll good. Wine X says an easy XX1/2 and you’ll get the extra half if you can wait a few years #wine #cabernetsauvignon #pasowine @russellfamilyvineyard #xratedwines
Kate Arnold 2017 Columbia Valley Cab: Like gettin’ a Bumble email from Selena Gomez’s secret account. Sexy & surprising. God yes! XX 1/2 and hoping for a second date. #wine #xratedwines #cabernetsauvignon @katearnoldwines
Boneshaker Zinfandel 2017: Juicy, peppery Filet Mignon on a popsicle stick.... can I lick you ? What if bite? Delicious for an every day drinker. Wine X sez: XX every day and twice on Sunday. @hahnwines #xratedwines #wine #zin #zinfandel
Z Force 2014. Think Gary Clark Jr cranked up during hot yoga. Busting out with spicy jam and balance. I’m breathless by choice. An easy XX. #wine #xratedwines #friday @zontesfootstep #garyclarkjr #hotyoga
May your #2020 start with a lotta #style and a little #crazy!!! Cheers! #wine #winedrunk #yummy #xratedwines
2016 Chateau Montelena Chardonnay Napa. Picture Eddie Murphy gettin’ tricky on a skateboard: Signature OG that has never been better. Bright and complex with a zippy ‘tude. I’m sad that I forgot how really good you are. Wine X sez: XXX with a snarky nod. @chmontelena #wine #chardonnay #yum #wine #hehe #xratedwines